hit by the dump truck
I have a friend for whom dumpage just happened. (Really, people, aren’t we getting a little too old for this?) Everything was going along swimmingly for her and the beau, and then: the next thing I know, we’re at ladies night, drowning ourselves in Cosmopolitans and pretending that it’s 2001.
Egads. My advice, drunken though it might have been, was to fill out every single page of the activity book Dumped!, and mail it to him. With his address scrawled in blood. (Kidding about the last part. But seriously, he is an asshole, and that would not be undeserved.)
With activities like word scrambles (how many phrases can you make out of “screw you?”) and connect-the-dots, it’s like really, really Mad Libs.
If you’d like the occasion to play vindictive and bitter all the way through to catharsis, then you’re in luck: this week, misosouper will give 3 lucky readers copies of Dumped! To enter, you need to post a breakup haiku in the comments, writing either from the giving or receiving end of the split. (ETA: entries that are not haiku will be disqualified.) Best three win the prize.
And if you’re interested in seeing who won the M641 giveaway, that information can be found in the original post’s comments. (All future contest winners will be notified by e-mail, as usual, and announced in giveaway post’s comments as well.)
the fine print:
Comments will be closed and entries will not be accepted after 11:59 pm EST on Saturday, January 17, 2009. The winner will be selected on Sunday, January 18, 2009, and notified by e-mail. Results of the giveaway will be announced on Monday, January 19, 2009. Multiple entries will not be accepted, and previous giveaway winners are not eligible. Misosouper, a shopping blog reserves the right to disqualify entries that are incomplete, inaccurate, or considered spam.
Tags: activities, book, Dumped!, funny, giveaway
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January 12th, 2009 at 1:35 pm
[...] misosouper, a shopping blog, featuring fashion, design, and gadgets Tell me what you buy, and I’ll tell you who you are. « hit by the dump truck [...]
January 12th, 2009 at 5:06 pm
He is out to lunch
I am picnicking with aunts
Relating my side.
January 12th, 2009 at 9:39 pm
Trucks, Poo, Garbage, Me
What do they all have in common?
They have all been dumped.
January 13th, 2009 at 6:28 pm
jerk, rage, boyfriend, scream
Finally it is OVER
Claiming my freedom
January 15th, 2009 at 10:47 am
Two-timer, get out!
Who you starch those hot sheets with?
No sugar tonight!
January 16th, 2009 at 1:59 pm
I talk, you argue
Raindrops, teardrops, I drop, STOP
I pick myself up
January 16th, 2009 at 4:54 pm
Your Breathe smelled to bad
and you did stink like a wet dog
get away from me!
January 16th, 2009 at 8:00 pm
Air sucked out of me.
I know somewhere he is laughing
I am all but gone.
January 16th, 2009 at 9:10 pm
I love you today
That’s what you said to me then
I love you today
January 16th, 2009 at 11:06 pm
I think that you suck
And I can’t stand to see you
So we’re over NOW
January 17th, 2009 at 10:30 am
Goodbye my lover,
In my heart you live now,
Tomorrow your gone.
January 17th, 2009 at 11:43 am
Chemistry was fire
We were a covalent bond
You iced, I melted.
January 17th, 2009 at 7:41 pm
quit wasting my time
my bio clock is ticking
theres some one for every one
January 17th, 2009 at 8:31 pm
The timing was right
But he became too ripe
Spoilage stinks, me thinks.
January 19th, 2009 at 7:49 am
Congrats to winners juedy, reeva, and memetu!